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Hello, yes, I'd like to cancel my donation to Freelance Beatdown and instead place it into Paul Rudd: Future Fucker.

I also think the character should be Paul Rudd played by Paul Rudd. It would give a great reason for why he was frozen. I mean, he's goddamn Paul Rudd, of course we want to preserve him for future generations.

Also, Jordan has the slight worry of having to confront a celebrity crush in Aubrey Plaza, as she's only half a social circle away. I think Psychic Andy needs to worry about Elizabeth fucking Paul Rudd, for the same reason. They've both been on Doug Loves Movies and Paul Rudd has been on Doug Loves Movies. It's entirely possible that they could all end up on Doug Loves Movies together, then, of course, Elizabeth is going to be taking Paul to pound town.

Elizabeth's comments on women who date stereotypically "attractive" men is something I always wonder about. The women I'm friends with and have dated feel the same way. But what of those girls who are overly into ripped abs. Where does that come from? Did some men in media tell women what a "hot guy" looks like and some women play along so that they seem normal? And is this because the men who created these archetypes of male hotness can only conceptualize of attraction the way men do? Interesting paper topic for a women's studies class!

Also, loved the bath salts discussion. What is it with kids and their weird drugs and whatever happened to LSD, mushrooms and ecstasy? Kids today don't know how to do drugs properly.

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"It's Mike IQ because I used to be in a punk band called IQ of 2. I don't think I'm smart. In fact, I'm pretty sure that I'm retarded."

This was interesting to me too; it's a favorite topic of mine. When I was a teenager I was pretty deeply into internet fandom surrounding classic movie actor Peter Lorre (pictured in my avatar). There were (and are) plenty of women who found him attractive. Some men, inside and outside of the fandom, seemed to be really uncomfortable with that (women are generally more understanding about crushes on weird-looking men, because they've had them). You'd think that it would be encouraging to see women swooning over a small, non-Anglo-Saxon, non-macho, admittedly odd-looking guy, but some guys seemed to find that threatening. It's weird.

The cultural idolization of certain kinds of males can really make adolescent girls feel like something's wrong with them before they grow up and realize that everyone's boat is floated by a different kinda thing -- c.f. this essay by Anne Sharp:

It's astonishing how many people will ask who your favorite actor is. Don't they have any idea what a personal question that is? I would flush and stall, trying to come up with an acceptable reply. I must tell the truth or die. In the end I always died, though, because I tried to be frank, but would be pressured into betraying him. People would make a face and say, "Well, what you mean is you like his acting. You're not in LOVE with him."

I would nod and turn away. I saw mental hospitals in my future.

He was so beautiful.

I can't imagine what it does for adolescent BOYS' self-esteem. I'm glad we have internet fandom now to tell us we're not weirdos or uggos because we don't like or look like a certain narrowly-defined thing.

Good quote and good input, lydia. I was definitely one of those adolescent boys who had self-esteem issues based on the false notion that women only liked men with "six-pack" abs, (I've had a bit of a pot belly since I was a kid, but was never overweight - it's just my natural shape,) and straight, blonde Anglo hair, (I had a Jewfro when I still had hair,) and had almost zero body hair, (I am Mediterranean and thus, quite hirsute.) I was well into my twenties before I developed self-confidence.

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"It's Mike IQ because I used to be in a punk band called IQ of 2. I don't think I'm smart. In fact, I'm pretty sure that I'm retarded."

http://instagr.am/p/QBIqPMzfQA/

Off topic, but: hooray!

Also, I totally agree about Ray Romano being hilarious. A few years back, I received the complete Dr. Katz DVD Box set and Romano's bits are the funniest by far, just as I remembered them!

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"It's Mike IQ because I used to be in a punk band called IQ of 2. I don't think I'm smart. In fact, I'm pretty sure that I'm retarded."

Easily the most over-looked yet funniest thing about Rushmore is the recurring mention of handjobs, because it's such a high school thing and IS a big deal but at the same time not at all a big deal.

Spiderman 223! Hooray!

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Twitter: @ImenandParker
Tumblr: http://www.imenandparker.tumblr.com
Music: http://www.brokencities.com

Yeah! He was quiet for a pretty long time there. Glad to see he's still around!

Oh, another thing - Jordan, I am totally right there with you re: Pink. I find her super attractive. I actually have a thing for tomboyish girls with short hair and have unfortunately fallen for a number of lesbians as a result!

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"It's Mike IQ because I used to be in a punk band called IQ of 2. I don't think I'm smart. In fact, I'm pretty sure that I'm retarded."

It wasn't until I moved to Poughkeepsie that I realized how often it's used for "Place with Funny Name" joke. Somehow I still get excited when it gets mentioned, though.

I hope Jordan makes it out of the drug-fueled bachelor party. I'm probably just sheltered but I would be trying to get out of going if I knew hard drugs were going to be about.

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Some beeps and boops I made/Sometimes I write funny things on twitter

I know what a "BJ" is and what an "HJ" is, but what the hell is a "CJ"? Did I hear that right?

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Now these points of data make a beautiful line and we're out of beta, we're releasing on time.

Do you think spiderman223 knows about us?

I've seen him rt people telling Jordan how happy they are that spiderman223 is tweeting again. Does he know why we love him? If he does know, he's a surprisingly good sport about it. I would have expected him to tell me to go fuck my dick pussy, not follow me.